Impractical Visions
by Donjusticia
Summary: A parody of Sinking Into Ruined Shadow's "Impossible Visions." At this moment, it is time to take a stand against the wave of angsty Zarc X Ray stories! It is time to fight back! Join me in spreading egao and nonsense to this segment of the fandom as we fully embrace Yuya's ideals and go nuts with smiles and laughter!


DISCLAIMER!

THE FOLLOWING IS YET ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF DONJUSTICIA DOING HIS UTMOST TO AVOID WRITING THE NEXT LONG-AWAITED CHAPTER OF "VENOM'S QUEST." "IMPOSSIBLE VISIONS" IS OWNED BY SINKING INTO RUINED SHADOWS FOR NOW, BUT WILL SOON BE MINE ONCE MY LATEST EVIL SCHEME COMES TO FRUITION! ENJOY. 

Impractical Visions 

His eyes were flashing so many colors! Possibly it was due to his struggles against the demonic Zarc, but most likely it was due to the many substances Yuya had been smoking prior to getting possessed.

This, however, did not stop him from trying to speak to make one final request before he died in an utterly dramatic and tragic way.

"YuRiRuRena…" Yuya slurred, mixing up the names of the four girls that composed Ray, "…just this one flavor…I mean…favor…I…can't…gah…blagh!" Yuya gurgled as Zarc began exercising even more control over him.

"Hmmm? What's that?" Ray asked, eyeing Yuya with confusion. "I'm sorry, it's just…I can't understand a word you're saying."

Yuya started to jibber out something else, but Ray and the various girls that made up her essence were far too distracted by the beautiful eye colors of their various boyfriends to notice.

"Turquoise…" Rin sighed. "Like my favorite flavor of blueberry vanilla ice cream Yugo got me when he wasn't being such a baka and giving me strawberry."

"Pink…" Selena purred, eyelids fluttering with pleasure. "Because even if Yuri pretends to be a cruel and crusty villain, he still has plenty of girly attributes, like when he plays with his little dolls."

"THEY ARE ACTION FIGURES!" Yuri snarled from within Zarc.

"Grey…" Ruri crooned, licking her lips with desire. "Like the smoke coming from that fireplace Yuto and I cuddled up in front of."

"Red…" Yuzu murmured. "Like Yuya's face gets whenever he and I hold hands."

"Demonic…" Ray giggled with delight. "Like when Zarc became that sexy demon overlord for my birthday before we…"

"YUZU!" Yuya roared, noticing how none of the girls were paying attention. "COULD YOU PLEASE SPLIT US NOW!? I REPEAT! I…CAN'T…HOLD…HIM…OFF…FOREVER!"

"Oh…uh…RIGHT! SORRY!" Ray, Yuzu, Selena, Ruri, and Rin all apologized in unison. "I, I mean we, I mean I…whatever, I/we will get right on it!"

"Hurry!" Yuya pleaded.

 **"SHUT UP!"** Zarc protested, his voice being so dark and evil that the very text itself blackened with the evilness of it.

Hesitantly, Ray/all the other girls pulled out the four legendary plot device cards Leo had created, thinking of the dark and angsty ending that was sure to follow their use of the cards. For while Zarc could very well live on, Ray would surely die a horrifically dark, angsty, emo, and tragic death and be separated from her beloved Zarcy forever!

Ray hesitated, before Zarc inexplicably broke character and whispered the words:

"Do it, my love! Give the readers the 'Romeo and Juliet' ending they are all craving!"

And so, bracing herself for the tear-inducing ending she knew was about to come, Ray prepared to activate the cards.

But then she thought, "Wait…I am being WAY too melodramatic right now! I don't have to KILL myself to stop the Zarc apocalypse! No…that's stupid. Since Supreme Dragon King Zarc basically used a trading card to turn himself into an evil god, then it stands to reason that I could just…play a copy of De-fusion and defuse the four boys without harming anybody!"

"What!?" Zarc and the other boys exclaimed in shock and surprise.

"That's so brilliant!" Yuzu cheered.

"Yay!" Ruri agreed, "Now nothing will get in the way of me and Yuto's happily ever after!"

"It does make you wonder why the Professor didn't just play a copy of Super Polymerization to fuse the dimensions." Selena mused.

"It's just because he's an idiot." Rin shrugged before Zarc was enveloped in the light of De-Fusion and got split into each of his four components.

"Well that was…" Yuri began, dusting himself off.

"Anticlimactic?" Yuto guessed, blinking in surprise that the conflict had been resolved so easily.

"It's still tragic, though!" Yugo wept.

"How is it tragic?" Yuya asked.

"Because Ray isn't split, I'll never see Rin again!" Yugo tearfully explained.

"That's so true!" Yuya cried. "I've lost Yuzu forever!"

"Ruri, no!" Yuto called as the horror of their tragedy sank in.

"I'm actually good with this." Yuri shrugged, getting ready to get back to what he was doing before he became an evil demon (namely, carding everyone in sight like an evil demon).

"Actually, I've already solved that problem too!" Ray enthused, pulling out a few more cards in her deck.

"What?" the other boys exclaimed, surprised that Ray was ready to ruin yet another tragic but beautiful ending.

"Yep!" said Ray, showing the card she had pulled out, "So basically…since I'm a fusion of the four bracelet girls, and Fusion Materials go to the Graveyard once they have been used, I figured I could just play a copy of Soul Charge and bring them all back while simultaneously ensuring that I could stay in existence!"

"But, it costs 1000 Life Points for each person you resurrect! With just 4000 points, you don't have enough life points to bring them all back!" Yuya wept.

"We're still trapped in a tragic ending!" Yuto wailed.

"One of the bracelet girls will have to be left behind, or else Ray will have to sacrifice herself bringing them all back!" Yugo mourned.

"I volunteer Selena as tribute to be sacrificed." Yuri piped in.

"HEY!" Selena snarled.

"Oh, don't be silly, everyone." Ray giggled. "All I have to do is play the card, Spell Economics, and I don't have to pay ANY Life Points!"

And defying the tragic ending that was supposed to happen yet again, Ray magically brought back all the bracelet girls WITHOUT having to sacrifice herself.

"Uhm…" Yuya thought, trying to figure out how to salvage the ending of the supposed-to-be tragic story that was quickly getting ruined by Ray's constant meddling. "You…still won't get to see Zarc again since you tragically had to destroy him to free us!"

"Monster Reborn!" Ray countered, causing Zarc to reappear behind the boys in a puff of smoke.

"But he's still evil…" Yuya began.

"Change of Heart!" Ray giggled, causing Zarc to instantly change his personality from a heartless demon to a great guy who loved rescuing stray cats.

"Ray, my love!" Zarc exclaimed, rushing over to give Ray a great big hug before nursing a sick bunny to health with a bottle of warm milk.

"I…uh…" Yuya was running out of ways to make this a tragic story. All in all, this was starting to become WAY too corny and cheesy, a combination which Yuya most certainly did not appreciate, not when he had gotten used to him and Yuzu getting constantly separated.

At first, Yuya had been saddened when he and Yuzu had been separated all those times, but then he had begun to realize just how wonderful tragedy could be! The tears, the emotions, the ratings! It was all worth it once one realized that a tragic and realistic ending was far more artistically sound than a corny and cheesy happy ending! If someone didn't die soon…

Suddenly, Yuya knew EXACTLY what he had to do!

"Oh, no!" Yuya gasped, randomly bleeding from his mouth. "I resisted Zarc for so long that I'm now dying! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Oh, don't worry." Ray reassured Yuya, "I can just activate a copy of Dian Keto the Curemaster to…"

"NOTHING CAN SAVE ME NOW!" Yuya melodramatically wailed, undergoing his final death throws. "Yuzu…I'm dying…there is something…I have…to tell…you…before…before…"

"Oh, quit being such a baby." Yuzu scolded, activating Dian Keto the Curemaster to instantaneously heal Yuya before he could tragically die.

"Wow!" Yugo gawked, as he and Rin reunited in an extremely cute and cheesy fashion.

"Trading cards really do solve all our problems." Yuto mused as he and Ruri began holding hands.

"And cause all our problems!" Leo added, causing Ray to shrug before she and Zarc also began holding each other's hands.

"Frankly, I think the tragic ending where Selena sacrificed herself would have been better." Yuri huffed, causing Selena to glare at him.

"Whelp…" Yuya sighed, realizing that there was now nothing he could do to create a tragic ending with the power of Ray's various trading cards, "since I guess we've managed to find the miracle ending route where nobody dies and everybody is happy, I guess…well…I could make this ending romantic." He winked, taking Yuzu's hands in his own and giving her a sly wink.

"Yuya...really!?" Yuzu squealed, blushing red as a tomato.

"Yuzu…" Yuya began, looking into her eyes while assuming a more serious expression. "There's something I have to tell you. Something I've wanted to tell you for a very long time!"

"What is it, Yuya?" Yuzu asked, now feeling nervous, if not a little excited.

"Ever since I did that one duel where I stole that copy of Polymerization from you…" Yuya began, causing Yuzu to glare at him. "Yeah, sorry about that," he hastily apologized, "but ever since that game…I realized something…something about the way I feel!"

He pulled Yuzu close, looking deep into her bright blue eyes as she looked into his deep red eyes.

"Yuzu, I have finally realized that I, Yuya Sakaki, am deeply and utterly in love…"

"In love?" Yuzu asked, looking surprised. "With who?"

"Yuzu…" Yuya continued, holding her even closer, "I have finally figured out that I…am in love…" he paused, struggling against the power of his own feelings before plucking up the courage to say,  
"with Mieru Hochun."

…

…

…

Yuzu began laughing.

"Oh, Yuya…you kidder…" she giggled, "I mean, you totally wouldn't…I mean…you like me…right!?" she growled.

"Oh no, I'm in love with Mieru." Yuya replied with a happy laugh.

"WHAT THE HECK DID YOU SAY!?" Yuzu bellowed, eyes glowing with berserk fury.

"That I'm in love with Mieru Hochun." Yuya finished with utter and complete sincerity. "Ever since that one duel I had with her…I can't stop thinking about her! And now that I have rescued you, I can finally invite you over to our wedding so you can see us unite in holy matrimony! Isn't it wonderful!?"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Yuzu roared, throwing Yuya off herself and grabbing a card from Ray before she could stop her.

"Now Yuzu!" Ray protested, "Remember what we said about wanting to avoid an angsty and tragic ending!"

"IF I CAN'T HAVE YUYA THEN NOBODY GET'S TO HAVE HIM!" Yuzu shrieked, going completely insane with jealousy.

"But I could have such a happy future with Mieru!" Yuya protested.

"SHUT UP YUYA! YOU WILL NOT EVER BE UNITED WITH THAT STUPID FORTUNETELLING DUELIST VOICED BY THE SAME VOICE ACTRESS WHO VOICED MADOKA! I ACTIVATE DARK HOLE TO DESTROY EVERYTHING!" Yuzu bellowed, slamming down the magic card and subsequently destroying all the characters in exactly the type of tragic ending the story was always meant to have.

You're welcome, fandom. Now please don't kill me in the review section.


End file.
